Following a concerning episode of blood loss, Love found herself navigating the American healthcare system with Gray as her only support. The doctor’s visit revealed unexpected challenges, as the language barrier created frustration and confusion. “During the doctor’s visit, I struggled to comprehend and respond to most of the nurse’s questions,” Love recalls. “To make it worse, he sometimes had difficulty explaining things to me or I to him.”
The appointment brought life-changing news: two lines on a urine test indicating pregnancy. “‘No, I’m not prepared for this,’ I silently thought,” Love shares. The situation became more complex when a blood test was ordered to check on the “baby’s” well-being after the significant blood loss.
Love’s health deteriorated rapidly. “Dizziness and nausea plagued me, particularly when traveling by car. I lost interest in going out and spent most of my time resting in the apartment’s bed,” she writes. “For nearly 10 hours each day, I would lie there, caught between sleep and wakefulness, day and night feeling sick and alone when he was not around.”
When the nurse confirmed the pregnancy, Gray’s reaction was unforgettable. “A radiant smile of joy spread across his face, his smile etching itself into my heart deeply,” Love remembers. The pregnancy seemed miraculous given Gray’s previous disclosure that “he had confided in me that the one thing he couldn’t provide was children” after unsuccessful attempts with his first wife.
Despite cultural reservations about unmarried pregnancy, Love chose to embrace the situation: “It felt like the perfect opportunity to fulfill his dream and make him the happiest man on Earth by becoming a father, a role he had once believed might never be his.”
However, her health continued to decline. As a long-time pescatarian, finding suitable food in America proved challenging. “Despite his efforts to find a vegetarian restaurant, none could be found. As a result, I grew increasingly unwell from not eating or drinking for nearly a week.”
A crisis point came during a frightening emergency room visit. “Lying in the emergency room bed, I found myself surrounded by people striving to assist me. Yet, I comprehended almost none of their communication attempts,” Love shares. The language barrier reached a critical point: “It was one of the worst moments in my life when I was unable to express myself verbally in this life-threatening situation.”
The nurse’s warning was clear and dire: “You need to eat! If you don’t, you and the baby will die.” This stark reality forced Love to confront difficult choices about her dietary restrictions. “I would lie in bed feeling sad, helpless, and starved, thinking for hours to no avail. I recall scrolling through internet images of Taiwanese cuisine from the computer, tears streaming down my face.”
In a moment of desperation, Love found an unexpected solution: “Then, one morning, a thought occurred to me: KFC chicken, a familiar sight back in Taiwan.” This compromise represented more than just a meal choice: “I knew I had to give up my status and let go of my pescatarian diet to provide sustenance for both my body and the baby.”
The experience taught Love that survival sometimes requires letting go of long-held principles. Her journey from vegetarianism to accepting KFC chicken symbolized a broader truth about adaptation and sacrifice in the face of necessity. As Arnold Ehret observed, “Life is a tragedy of nutrition,” but it’s also a testament to human resilience and the lengths one will go to protect a new life.
Discover more stories of resilience and adaptation in “Grow in the Dark” by Amy Love. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Google, iTunes & Kobo.